How to work with your Wounded Child…

So this is Week 5 of the 7 weeks of Imbolc – the Celtic fire festival sacred to the Goddess Brighid, Brigit, Bride.

As Brigit is the Protector and Healer of Children, during Imbolc we journey with our Inner Child.

Last night, I felt exhausted and vulnerable, you know that mood we all get into sometimes.

Then my family started teasing me but for some reason it really touched a nerve.

I went up to my bedroom and began to cry. I didn’t even consciously know why I was crying, but I couldn’t stop.

My Wounded Child was expressing deeply held pain from long ago in my childhood and most probably past-life – the pain of feeling an outcast, alone, of being rejected by a group.

There is no single event, just an accumulation of memories which together feed into The Outcast archetype.

The first shadow reaction I have is to run. To get in the car and drive, with no idea where I’m going.

When I realise that’s not an option, my mind goes to the next shadow coping mechanism – addiction – another means of escape from the pain my Wounded Child is feeling.

Fantasies appear of getting drunk, smoking cigarettes, anything that will numb the pain and distract me from actually feeling.

But as a recovering alcoholic who’s been sober for over 12 years, I know that’s not the answer.

So then I choose to stay where I am and feel the pain, and it’s excruciating as my Wounded Child sobs with an intensity as if the initial wounding just happened.

That’s how it is when we access those deeply held places of pain – the feelings are still as acute as they were then, as if time has literally stood still.

The best thing we can do is sit with the pain, resist distracting ourselves from it or trying to escape from it, allow our Inner Child to fully re-experience and express their wounding, and parent them with the unconditional love and compassion they need to feel safe & secure.

Afterwards, as we return to our conscious Adult Self, we can feel confused and stunned by the emotional outpouring from our unconscious, which may seem at odds with how we feel as a mature, emotionally intelligent adult.

But the seed of our wisdom, the root of our Soul’s evolution lies exactly in this process – in the courageous journey of healing with our Wounded Child.

With my love and blessings on your own healing journey

Annabel Du Boulay Signature